I think there comes a point in your weight loss where people stop paying attention because you lost weight. They can't relate to you anymore. I know what these people think "You lost weight how much more do you really need to lose?" "You look great! What the hell are you still complaining about?" "I would kill to be the weight you are now" "Aren't you done?" Then after that comes the part where they decide I'm nothing like them, "Well she obviously loves to work out, I hate working out." "This is totally easy for her, it's hard for me" "She's just miss fitness now, it's not a challenge for her like it is for me" "She must love eating healthy, I hate vegetables, I hate that kind of crap"
And this is where I tell you, you are wrong. Is it true that I love to work out, umm no. I enjoy how I feel when I work out, I feel accomplished, and energized. I feel strong, and happy. Does that make dragging my ass to the gym every day any easier? No. Are there days when I am excited to get to the gym? Yes, I will admit there are those days, but that is not every day. There are days I seriously just want to say screw it, and stay home in my jammies. There are days I am tired and worn out and getting myself to the gym is a miracle, it's a fight with myself the whole drive over, the whole walk in, and even when I get onto a treadmill I am still not 100% committed.
Yes it is true I lost weight, and now that I look better and feel better it seems I have reached my goal and I should be done right? Wrong. I have not reached my personal goals.
Do I enjoy eating healthy and counting calories and being rigid and sticking to a meal plan? HELL NO. I LOVE food. I love crappy food. I love donuts and cookies, and cake, and cheese, and italian food, and mexican food, and chocolate. I LOVE food. I get so bored eating the same shit all the time. Eating the same boring meals balanced with the perfect carbs, and proteins. I get bored with all the salad, and veggies. I think about cake at least once a day. I think about donuts at least once a week. I miss these things and it takes a lot of self control not to eat that stuff. Do I treat myself? Yes, I can't give it up completely, but I have a goal in mind and for now that means commitment and willpower. Each day is a challenge for me. It's not fun or easy. Over time does it get easier? Yes. It becomes a lifestyle. It becomes compulsory over time, but it still takes willpower, and drive.
When I started this in June I enjoyed food, too much food. I enjoyed sitting my happy ass in front of a computer for hours and not being active. Deciding to change was hard, and there were times I wanted to give up. I cried, I was grumpy. I cussed, I cried some more. It was hard, hard, hard! I had withdraws, I missed my comfort food. I missed being able to eat a scone when I was stressed or grumpy. I had to come up with new coping mechanisms, and that was HARD. But after some challenging weeks things got easier and seeing my body change was a huge motivator. But it didn't get EASY. It simply got less difficult.
Don't be discouraged, if I can do it, so can you, seriously. I know what is like to rely on food, to love food, to feel tired and lazy. I know what it's like to want to give up. But it's about pushing through. It's about facing yourself. That's hard. The hardest part is truly accepting that you love and you rely on it too much. The hardest part is facing your demons and not turning away. Keep moving, keep going. Don't give in. Don't give up because of the time and dedication it will take. You are capable of changing your life, you just have to want it bad enough.
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